Disaster Dates [Paleo]
You read that right. This turned out to be quite a fail, but because my blog is more of a “follow me on my journey even if it sometimes sucks” blog rather than a strict food blog, I have no problem at all posting my cooking fails. I woke up this morning well rested and motivated for the CrossYoga session my CF box was hosting. In my previous post I shared the recipe for the Sweet Potato Almond Butter
Cookies Squishies I made to bring along as a Paleo snack. Well, since they came out squishy I was determined to bring something more aesthetically pleasing (I could already hear people whispering “Who in the hell brought rubber cookies…”). Enter cooking fail number one, Bacon Wrapped Disaster Dates. To make, you will need:
Well that was fairly easy. Before beginning, go ahead and preheat your oven to about 200 degrees Celsius. Now for the prep – put your strips of bacon on a plate and heat them up in a microwave for about 1-2 minutes. This will cook them a bit and make it easier to wrap them around the dates (otherwise they fall apart…at least they do with me). Since dates are tiny, you can go ahead and cut your bacon strips in half.
Now comes the part where you simply roll your dates up in a strip of bacon and use a toothpick to hold them together. When you’re done, you’re ready to stick them in the oven!
Right. So that was easy. How could someone possibly
fuck mess that up? I’ll tell you how. With an ancient German gas oven that I have yet to figure out. Seriously. If anyone knows what 200 equals on an oven that has a range from 1-8, HOOK A SISTA UP.
(Seriously. WTF DO I DO?)
Well after 10 minutes I smelled something crispy in the air. I ran to the oven and took my Paleo treats out only to discover they were ruined. Completely burnt. If the following picture doesn’t convince you, well, just trust me. They tasted like ash.
*sigh* It’s okay. I won’t let this get me down! I will be making these again sometime during the week, preferably before heading to my CrossFit box so I can share them. I WILL get them right. I WILL defeat The Teufel.