Dark Nutty Delights

Dark Nutty Delights [Paleo & Vegetarian]

This post is going to be short and sweet (super sweet)! Again, I made some last minute cookies and holy *&$^#*@#*&$&@*# they turned out to be the bomb diggity. Like, the bomb dot freaking com. So let’s get to it – the ingredients:

– 1/2 Cup Hazelnut Grounds
– 1 Cup Almond Grounds
– 1/4 Cup Almond Slivers
– 1/4 Cup Hazelnut Chopped
– 1/4 Cup Coconut Flakes (not shavings!)
– 1/2 Cup Coconut Milk
– 1/8 Cup Almond Milk
– 1 Egg
– Dash of Sea Salt
– 1/8 Tsp Baking Soda
– 1/8 Tsp Baking Powder
– 1/2 Tsp Vanilla Flavoring
– 1/4 Cup Olive Oil
– 2 Blocks of Dark Chocolate (85%)
– Honey
– Coconut Shavings
– 1/2 TBS Cinnamon

At this point I have to thank Bugs (my friend who sent me a fabulous package that inspired me to keep blogging) for the journal she sent. After mixing up the above ingredients I (thankfully) remembered to jot everything down – and what do you know? I had my journal and my trusty wand nearby!

ImageThis is what happens when you give me toys. I am forever picking up my “wand” and waving it around casting spells.

“Oh what? You don’t want to open for me, door? ALOHOMORA, sucka!”

Yes. This is my life…

Back to the recipe. Stick all of the ingredients, aside from the Coconut Shavings, the Honey, and the Dark Chocolate, into a big bowl. Mix. Now make little cookies, place them on wax paper, sprinkle them with the Coconut Shavings, and put them in the oven. Again, I had The Teufel set to 6. After about 10 minutes take your cookies out and drizzle them with honey. Now stick them back in for an additional 5 minutes. Once they’re done take them out and let them cool for a bit. As they do, put your Dark Chocolate into a cup and melt it in the microwave for 2-3 minutes. Mmmmmmmmm. Now take that melted chocolate and pour it over the tops of your cookies. GO CRAY. Once that’s done, pop your cookies into the fridge to let the chocolate cool and harden for about 10 minutes. Finally…alles ist fertig. Now you may feast.

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*sigh* Since I’m a nice person, I took the majority of the cookies to work, and to CrossFit to share with my friends. Yes. They should consider themselves extremely lucky (and loved). If you have the time, give these cookies a try. You will not be disappointed. They are heavenly. Dare I say my baking skills are getting better? Better not jinx it. Especially since this week I’m attending a Paleo Dinner with friends from the Box. I plan on bringing these cookies, only I’ve decided…

…wait for it…

to add bacon. Yes. You read that right. Fingers crossed it tastes as good as I’m imagining it will. Right. Bed time! Again I leave you with another tune. From one of the baddest chicks. Enjoy!

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Coconut Honey Crumbles

Coconut Honey Crumbles [Paleo]

…plus Berlinale and CrossFit road-trip adventures! After work today I found I had a serious craving for something sweet (what else is new, right?) which I blame on the insanity currently taking place at work (again, what else is new?). Inspired by Paleo coconut cookies a friend of mine brought along on our road trip this weekend, I whipped up some Coconut Honey Crumbles. Why did I name them that? Umm, because coconut and honey are in the ingredients and they look crumbly. I know. I am so fucking creative it even blows my mind at times. I posted a picture on my Facebook page & received some requests for the “recipe”. I quote “recipe” because I honestly just grabbed things from my shelf, mixed them up in a bowl, and stuck them in the oven. I ain’t lyin’. Luckily, the result turned out to be yummy (in my tummy) and so I will oblige and post this last-minute-omg-i-want-something-sweet-in-my-mouth-asap “recipe”.

Coconut Honey Crumbles
– 1 Cup Almond Grounds
– 2 TBS Hazelnut Grounds
– 2 TBS SunButter (You could substitute any kind in here!)
– 2 Squares broken Dark Chocolate (99%)
– 1/4 Cup of Dried Cranberries
– 1/4 Cup of Coconut Milk
– 1/4 Cup of Coconut Shavings
– As much Cinnamon as you desire.
– Honey

Possibly one of the best things about this “recipe”? It takes 5 minutes to prepare. Dump all of the ingredients listed above, aside from 1/8 of the Coconut Shavings and the Honey, into a giant bowl and whisk that scheisse up! Now attempt to make small balls (stop giggling) and roll them around in your remaining Coconut Shavings. Place them in the oven (I had The Teufel set on 6) for 10 minutes and they’re done! Almost. HAH. Fooled you. What actually happened was I took them out after 10 minutes, tried one and thought to myself oh hell naw – these are not sweet enough. So I drizzled honey over the tops of them and stuck them back in the oven (the oven wasn’t turned on, but it was still hot enough to let these Crumbles bake for an extra 2-3 minutes). NOW they’re done!

ImageSo delicious! Be sure to give them a try! I mean come on, they take a total of 15 minutes…

Berlinale

Basically, I love Berlin. Even more than my last blog post. Even more than yesterday. It’s true, earlier this week I was asking friends where I could go hiking nearby because I was having a crazy home-sickness for the countryside…but then Berlinale happened. Y’all, my small town German countryside roots definitely came out for all of Berlin to witness. Berlin is currently packed with film celebrities and OMG I AM FREAKING OUT. I went to the premier of Wes Anderson’s  The Grand Budapest Hotel with a friend (who is also from the German countryside), to watch the stars walk the Red Carpet. Needless to say we absolutely lost our shit control when we found ourselves within five feet (FIVE FEET) of Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes), Edward Norton, Bill Murray (he exited his car holding a full Martini, which he prost-ed to the crowd before chugging in one gulp), Tilda fuckinggoddessofawoman Swinton, Jeff Goldblum, Saoirse Ronan, Wes Anderson and many more. When all of the celebrities had entered the showing of the film, my friend and I went to a bar where we kept switching back and forth from a dazed silence to shouts of “OMG WE WERE RIGHT NEXT TO HIM/HER!”

ImageAvada Kedavra y’all, Avada Kedavra.

Road Trip to Bratislava!

One last thing I need to mention in tonight’s blog (because who knows when I will write again) is the road trip I went on with friends from CrossFit Spree. One of the members at our box works for BoxRox and was heading to the Central Europe Throwdown in Bratislava, Slovakia for the weekend. Lucky for me, he extended the invitation to anyone who was interested. Let’s see, road trip to a country I have yet to visit to see sexy men with glistening muscles workout? SIGN ME UP. I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to travel with! Thanks to a last minute (and brilliant) suggestion, we decided to make a pit-stop in Prague on the way to Bratislava. Excellent decision. Turned into about a 2 hour detour as we stuffed our faces with yummy food, and walked around the city basking in the blue skies and sunshine.

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We eventually got back on the road to Bratislava and ended up at our hotel around 20:00. As soon as we were checked-in, we left to check out CrossFit Pressburg who’s team was helping to host the Central Europe Throwdown. Oh, and of course we managed to squeeze a (ridiculously intense) WOD in as well.

ImageAwwwwww yeah! Next morning we went straight to the event to see the first WOD. Originally, some of the girls and I had planned on leaving the event halfway through to see some of the sights in Bratislava – HAH, that definitely didn’t happen. I have never been in such an incredibly uplifting atmosphere. People all around were cheering on every single athlete who had qualified and dared to compete for the event. Onlookers urged the competitors on as they completed snatches, cleans, handstand push-ups, muscle-ups, wall balls, and many more challenges to fight their way into the Top 10.

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ImageIf you ever need to be inspired to workout, come to one of these events. It has definitely motivated me to push myself for the next year and a half in order to come back as a competitor rather than just a spectator. Mark my words. The world needs more Elisabeth Akinwales – such a beast!

Right. It’s time for me to head to bed. So I bid you goodnight and leave you with this sweet, sweet tune.  May it brighten your day and boost you with a bit of confidence while you’re getting ready in the mornings. “The mirror be like…”

Muffin-Tastic-SPLOSION

Muffin-Tastic-SPLOSION [Paleo]

Y’all. Like seriously, y’all. This was the BEST outcome I have had so far with Paleo baked goods. I owe it all to my lovely friends at CrossFit Spree who helped me hunt down Almond Grounds & Coconut Milk (still on the look out for Coconut Flour, Almond Flour & pure Almond Milk – help me out if you’re in Berlin). These muffins are fantastic. I can not stress it enough. If you try no other recipe on my page, TRY THESE. Added bonus? They’re Paleo Friendly.

Before we jump into the recipes though, I want to send a love filled shout out to my old roommate from my days in graduate school at University of Amsterdam. I was surprised by this perfect card in my mailbox earlier today.

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To quote her, the only way the card could have been more perfect is if it had pictured an Owl (me) & a Frog (her) – to keep a long (strange) story short, those are our spirit animals. The card was filled with a list of memories we shared in Amsterdam & it made me remember that the good should always outshine the bad (I’ve mentioned previously that my stay in Amsterdam wasn’t the best health wise)! I miss my old roommate but I am hoping to see her SOON!

Right. First muffin recipe I have for you is for Blueberry Almond Muffins sprinkled with Coconut. Y’ALL. SO GOOD. OMG. To begin, preheat your oven to 6.5 – please remember the POS I am working with. The dreaded Teufel. I think for y’all the oven should be around 300 degrees F. Here are the ingredients I began the evening with – by the end I had decided to make a second batch (didn’t take a picture of the different ingredients used) & was randomly mixing things together. As always.

Blueberry Almond Muffins sprinkled w/ Coconut:
– 1 & 1/2 Cups Almond Grounds
– 1 TBS Hazelnut Grounds
– 1/4 Tsp Sea Salt
– 1/2 Tsp Baking Soda
– 1/4 Tsp Vanilla Flavor
– 1/4 Cup Melted Coconut Oil
– 1/4 Cup Honey
– 1/4 Cup Coconut Milk
– 2 Eggs
– 1/2 Cup Blueberries
– Handful of Coconut Shavings

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Basically mix everything into a big bowl. I added all the dry ingredients first & then the wet ingredients one by one while constantly using my whisk in between. I melted my Coconut Oil before adding it to the mix. That is it. Now pour that delicious mix into cupcake holders. From my experience with Paleo cooking – more is definitely better. Since Paleo ingredients can sometimes have trouble rising, do not stop at halfway when filling your cupcake holders – fill those bad boys nearly to the top! Then sprinkle them generously with some Coconut Shavings. YUM.

ImageNext, stick them in the oven & leave them there for 20-25 minutes. While these were cooking I decided to make another batch of muffins. I was listening to good music & sipping on red wine – I guess I was simply in the mood to bake! This second batch was inspired by my sexy beast of a WOD partner who brought Paleo Brownies (THAT HAD BACON IN THEM) to the gym last week. It had never occurred to me to mix chocolate & bacon before – sorry but we don’t have insane state fairs filled with foods that induce heart attacks over here (OMG I miss all the heart attack inducing food at the Raleigh NC Fairs – deep fried Snickers bars? Yes please.) so I missed the “chocolate is amaze-balls when combined with bacon” memo. Well, after some mixing & matching I came up with…

Dark Chocolate & Bacon Banana Almond Muffins sprinkled w/ Cinnamon & Red Chili:
– 2 & 1/2 Cups Almond Grounds
– 1 TBS Hazelnut Grounds
– 1/4 Tsp Sea Salt
– 1/2 Tsp Baking Soda
– 1/4 Tsp Vanilla Flavor
– 1/4 Cup Melted Coconut Oil
– 1/4 Cup Honey
– 1/2 Cup Coconut Milk
– 2 Eggs
– 1/2 Bar of Dark Chocolate (I usually use 90-99%)
– 7 Strips of Bacon
– 1 Ripe Banana
– Chili Powder
– Cinnamon

Go ahead and mix all the dry ingredients, followed by adding the wet ingredients, as described for the previous muffins. When that’s done fry your bacon so it’s nice and crunchy (one of my trainers insisted crunchy bacon would be the bomb-diggity in baked goods – he was right).

ImageIt’s okay. I know you just drooled. I did as I was frying the bacon. Perfectly natural. Once it’s crunchy rip it up (or cut it up if you’re more civilized) into little bits. Throw it into your mix. Now break apart your dark chocolate and throw that into the mix as well. I decided to add a banana last minute (simply because it was totally brown). All I did was mash it up with a fork and whisk it in with the rest of my mixture. Walaaa. Fill up your cupcake holders (this will make 12 muffins) to the top and then sprinkle them with Cinnamon & Red Chili powder. SO GOOD. Again, stick these in the oven for 20-25 minutes.

The end result?

ImageOMG. Like OMG. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. So good it hurts. Except in a really really good way. You know? Like OMG. That’s basically all I can say at this point.

Blueberry Almond Muffins sprinkled w/ Coconut…

ImageDark Chocolate & Bacon Banana Almond Muffins sprinkled w/ Cinnamon & Red Chili…

Image*sigh* I will be bringing the majority of these with me to the Saturday Morning WOD tomorrow. Promises to be kept. Damnit. Have no doubt, I will be making these again. And again. And again.

In addition to these mind blowing muffins I wanted to give you a quick & easy Paleo Hot Cocoa recipe. Delicious & perfect for the cold weather!

Paleo Hot Cocoa:
– 1 Square of Dark Chocolate
– 1/2 Cup Coconut Milk
– 1/2 Cup Water
– 1 Scoop pure Cocoa Powder
– 1 TBS Honey
– Cinnamon

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Mmmmmmmmmm. Break the Dark Chocolate up into bits & melt in your cup for about 20-30 seconds. Then add your Coconut Milk & Water and microwave for about 2-3 minutes (or until it reaches the temperature you want). Last, add the Honey, the Cocoa Powder, and sprinkle some Cinnamon in. Mix it all up and ENJOY!

My song this week is one you can turn up while sipping on your Paleo Hot Cocoa, eating one of your Paleo Muffins, and enjoying a good book in the candle-light. At least, that’s what I plan on doing…